tears - a poem

Tears

All you want to do is cry

Shed the tears you long to shed

Let the sadness wash over you

Let it escape

Let it be erased.

All you want to do is cry

But the tears will not come.

You think about how he hurt you

How he broke your heart

How he made you promises

You should have known he wouldn't keep from the start.

It hurts to think of all these things, of all the ways he's hurt you

It makes your heart break even more

The shattered pieces ground into finer and finer dust

But no matter how much you think

No matter how much you dwell

You cannot get the tears to come.

So the clean tears that would erase the pain are replaced by ruby red droplets of blood.

Crimson smears that cause you pain, but pain you can control, pain that unleashes your anger, sadness and hatred.

When you are done, your arms like old cutting boards, the blade dropped in a splatter of blood on the bathroom floor, the pain of what he did is still not gone, just covered, smothered, by bloody, heartbroken blood.

And the tears still will not come.