open relationship - a poem

Open Relationship

You have your life

And I have mine.

We were friends

Once in time.

We shared joy and laughter

(and some sad times, too).

But you were always there

When I needed you.

You helped me through

Many tough times

Because you were a friend of mine.

You even told me you loved me

Although how much I didn't know.

But I believed you

And I never wanted you to go.

I thought our happiness would last forever

Even though you weren't near.

But as time moved on

I started to see.

There were many differences

Between you and me.

You were two years older

And headed for the stars.

While I would be stuck at home

My freedom not stretching very far.

And then one day you were gone

Even though you were never actually here.

I tried to be happy for you

Once your new life began.

But all my efforts were in vain

Because soon I was enveloped with pain.

You'd met another

And it seemed

You were happy as could be.

I tried to like her, too

I really tried hard.

But it didn't help

Because the pain didn't melt.

So I thought we were over

Done, finished, through.

Until one day

You told me some bittersweet news.

"She makes me very unhappy," you'd said

"She's always depressed, complaining, and a total mess."

I hadn't told you of the pain

I was going through.

I wanted you to think of me

As a supportive friend

Like the one I once knew.

So I offered suggestions, advice

For my love for you was still strong.

Finally, you decided

"I should end it —

It's for the best."

But you couldn't help feeling

Some dread in your chest.

I asked when you'd do it

And you said

"Soon, soon, soon!"

It's been over a month now

Since you said those words.

And you did nothing.

We've drifted apart, too

That's simple to see.

But I still miss

The way things used to be.

The joy, the happiness

Even the sadness we shared.

I try to be strong

Each and every day.

For I want you to be happy

I know deep down I do.

But I'll never stop envying her

The one who killed me and you.